Feeling Together

Its been very interesting to think about this. A few weeks ago Kip and I spend our 15th wedding anniversary vacation auditing Buck Brannaman for 7 days. Buck is definitely special. I found myself studying why. What makes him different?

I watched him artfully communicate with his horses. Of course he wasn't using a mechanical marker like a clicker and he for sure wasn't using food as a reward. Yet he was moving his horse towards the feel in a way that was beyond just pressure and release.

At one point Buck was talking about how extraordinary it was to be with a horse that was hunting the feel. He talked about giving the horse what it wants most in the world: PEACE. No wonder this guy doesn't need to use treats.

I could feel the lines in my forehead getting deeper as I strained to see how he was utilizing the laws of science and behavior modification with an accuracy I have rarely seen. And sure enough, he was using a marker and a reward. His marker was the release and his reward was the Peace of Feeling Together.

I think that it is very important to note that this is not a "peacefulness" that comes from robbing the horse of his sense of security or taking away the little peace he, as a flight animal, is born with. Its about adding a peace the horse didn't have before. That's when horse and human become more than what we were separately. So in fact, the release is a marker and not a reward.

A marker is a secondary reinforcer. It tells the horse "Yes! that was what I wanted!" A reward is something additional that you give the horse. Something that they want. Something that they didn't have before. The marker and the reward need to be linked together so the horse understands that the reward follows the marker.

This seems to be the critical difference between using avoidance behavior via pressure and release (Do X and I'll leave you alone.) vs using pressure (as little as necessary)to give the horse information about where to start hunting the feel. The thing about leaving him alone is...that is what he had before I got there. I frankly just took away his comfort in order to have something to exchange back. 

When I think about it, that's pretty pitiful. I don't want to have so little to offer my horse that I have to take away from him first. I want to Give to my horse. I want to bring something to the relationship. I think if we try to use the release of pressure as a marker and a reward simultaneously and don't add anything, we are missing that magical nugget all the special horsemen have been trying to describe throughout history.

Its a razor thin line... and I think its what makes a master. An artist. A true horseman sets things up for the horse to move TOWARDS instead of away. Moving towards the puzzle, towards the answer, towards the contact, towards empowerment, towards balance, towards peace. I want some more of that. I want to Feel those things Together with my horse so that we can be in  True Unity. 

More Progress With Nigel And The Trailer!

yayayayayay!

I feel like we are ALMOST over the hump. (man I hope so anyway)

Yesterday, I was able to load Nigel at liberty, lock him in, go about some yard chores, drive him up to the house, let him relax and eat quietly, unload him and have him put his nose into the truck to check me out for more cookies while I was getting ready to back it down the driveway!

He had a few moments of pounding initially when I practiced rolling the trailer back and forth, but when that didn't get reinforced he got quiet, came to the open manger door and looked at me. I clicked for it. Having the clicker has changed this horse's world when it comes to turning of his panic/rage system. In his fury of being locked in, he has moments of softness. That's when I click and treat. It is causing him to hold onto that feeling for longer and longer.

Another note: I seriously think that being able to turn around has been helping him. Its a little like the patience pole..they can move but only within certain parameters. He is finding the peaceful spot more and more! Totally excellent. Now, if I can just get him more experience in small enough increments so as to expand on that feeling.

SEEKING Is The Secret.

I use food rewards with my horses a lot and often get asked about how much I reinforce behavior with treats. How do I stop my horse from getting bitey or "muggy".

My experience tells me that on the surface, there are two parts to the answer. One is to make sure that I have a good driving game. Meaning that I can keep my horse out of my personal space. After all, if he can't reach me, he can't bite me or crowd me. This establishes me as a leader straight away and most importantly keeps me safe.

The second thing is to make sure that I am rewarding the things that I want. If my horse nips me or bites me or gets pushy I DO NOT give him a food treat. For heavens sake, why would I do that.

I think to myself...horsey, there is a way to get as many treats as you want. Just do something really cool! I mean seriously, if Nigel wanted to go out at liberty and do one tempi flying lead changes down the long side, he would get as many treats as I could get my hands on!

Speaking of Nigel, I've noticed that an interesting thing has been developing. He has become less and less pushy, bitey, and dominant. I'm guessing that part of that is this good leadership from me. But a new and life changing theory has occurred to me.

Nigel can now count on getting reinforcements with treats. He knows how to procure them. Therefore his anxiety and grabbyness is disappearing. Number one, getting rude doesn't net him anything and number two, doing impressive things (sometimes this is just standing very quietly for saddling)will always earn him a reward. I think this has flipped a switch in his brain.

The BIGGEST HUGEST thing that I've begun to understand, is that how he earns the reward is the important thing to him. At the core, it is not actually the treat that he values most. Engaging the SEEKING part of his brain is the key. Its the deepest most basic instinct that any living thing has.

It comes down to the simple fact that having puzzles and finding answers is what makes horses happy. The SEEKING instinct is more powerful than fear or dominance. Its how horses find water, safety, comfort, play and everything else that they need and want. Its what enables them to live and gives them quality of life.

I've noticed this with all my horses and even with my dog. Having an opportunity to hunt the answer is what they're after. Our great pyrenees Ava won't even take certain treats from me unless I've asked her to do something first. She wants her BRAIN fed. Not her tummy. The SEEKING instinct is in every organism. Its what causes a tree's roots to search deep down for the water vein in soil, a dandelion to find the weak spot in the concrete to break its way into the sunlight and moss to grow on the north side of trees. The SEEKING instinct is why we humans love to read books, play soduku, get masters degrees, hike to see a special mountain view, study horsemanship and millions of other things that we invest gobs of time and money into. It turns our brains on. It nourishes the very part of us that is alive.

I can't believe I am just figuring this out! I mean this is it right? This is the whole golden secret to giving my horses what they need. Its the truth about Horsemanship. My Oh my.

Is Fear A Gift?

One time I heard a security specialist say that it was. Those hairs standing up on the back of your neck are to be paid attention to. In terms of horsemanship, Parelli has always said that the moment you think about needing to get off your horse, you should. Don't ignore the feeling of dread in your stomach or the warning voice in your head.

Healthy fear is a pre incident indicator. It can help us avoid many a sticky wicket, dangerous event or the shattering of trust and confidence in ourselves. Just as we need to respect our horse's prey animal self preservation instincts, we need to respect ours.

BUT....there does come a time to take a leap of faith and to be brave. If we've done our prior and proper preparation, we've got to push the envelope a little more. Otherwise we don't progress.
View on youtube
Over the last month Nigel has felt so solid and trustworthy that I've been taking the bridle off. Of course, he and I have done our preparation. Making sure we have our yields to level 4...(Or at least 3++) However, I am very aware that even in the very best of circumstances, and on the most confident horse...things can happen. My horse could trip, a flock of quail could fly up and crash into my coverall, even an earthquake or a tree falling could spook my prey animal. And the reality is that it should.

One of the things I think about a lot and strive for in my life is balance. When do I plan for the future and when do I live as if today is my last day? How do I live in the moment with my horse and still have ambition? When do I listen to my fear and when do I tune it out to plunge forwards?

I don't have the answer. I suppose there really isn't one. I just have to do the best I can to feel it out. FDR said that we have nothing to fear but fear itself. My husband Kip says fear is not a gift..but caution is.
I think that it depends on how you look at it. The natural self preservation and will to live in all of us is a gift and confidence is a precious thing. Fear is important feedback about our circumstances and surroundings, giving us information on how to proceed. It is often governed by a powerful cocktail of subconscious and conscious data. I guess the key is to acknowledge it, respect it and yet not let it govern us unmitigated.

I suppose in life we have to take risks. Driving our cars down the freeway, swimming on vacation in Hawaii, or spinach from the grocery store can kill us. My friend Beth mentioned the other day that sometimes we've just gotta man up, roll the dice and accept the risk. Particularly if the circumstances are as good as they're going to get. We have to make the choice to move forward even at the risk of life and limb or stand still to keep the illusion of safety. So I've been taking the bridle off...and the feeling has been amazing.

I think maybe that is one of the most special qualities about a relationship between a horse and a human. Its an extraordinary mix of instinct, logic and spirit. Each individual causing the other to think more or feel more in order to progress. I think fear IS a gift and I'll take it.... especially because I have more experience with my horse and horsemanship helping me stay brave and in balance.

The Risk To Bloom

And then the day came
when the risk to remain
tight in a bud
was more painful than the
risk to bloom

-Anais Nin